hilarious xiangsheng
DaShan (big mountain in Mandarin) is the stage name of Canadian entertainment Mark Rowswell. He is supposedly the most famous foreigner in China for his impeccable grasp of Mandarin and even Cantonese. He specialises in xiangsheng, a form of stand-up comedy usually done as a dialogue.

I found this xiangsheng particularly funny. It doesn't have subtitles, so I'll provide a rough translation under the cut for non-Mandarin speakers.



It's long, so here's just the jist of it. Nuances tend to get lost in the translation so it may not turn out as funny.

(Dashan talks about how learning English can result in comedy. He gives the example of his mentor, Jiang Kun. He says that he brought his mentor with him to Canada and taught him a most basic phrase: "How much?" But phoenetically, to the mentor's ears it would sound like "Hao ma chi?")

Dashan: So on the second day, he went into a shop and told me, "I'll do it myself." So he calls the shop assistant over. And eager to use this phrase that he had just learned, he opened his mouth and asked: "Hao chi ma?" (= "Is it good to eat?")

Man in grey: "Hao chi ma?"

Dashan: He had just finished saying when it struck him that what he said wasn't quite right. So he flipped it around and tried again: "Ma hao chi?" (= nonsensical phrase literally meaning "scold good eat?") Still wasn't right, so he tried again: "Chi ma hao?" (= "eat mother well?") And again: "Chi hao le ma?" (= "Have you finished eating?")
And there I was panicking. The shop assistant was panicking too and she said, "I'd like to help you but I'm not sure what you're asking for." My mentor was stricken with embarassment. And then he had a sudden flash of inspiration, gave a bow, said "Sayonara!" and bolted out of the shop.

MIG: Why did he suddenly spout Japanese?

Dashan: Exactly what I asked him. And he said, "Stupid question! Of course, I can embarass the Japanese people, but I can never embarass the Chinese people!"